Sunday, January 17, 2010

Another Layer

Time for another layer to be removed. Living a life for God comes with much joy, but first a little pain. Friday I was faced with yet another layer of insecurity that has held me back. It was another layer of "trust issues" that God wanted to free me from. Only this one was hard for me to see. It was this chronic pain that I was so used to. I honestly did not notice it anymore, because it was so apart of me. God saw it and wanted me to be free.
As I began to pray this through I began to see how comfortable I was in my brokenness. This angered me. How could I be comfortable living with everyone at an arms length? How could I be comfortable not trusting? I was comfortable because it was what I knew. It was a defining part of me. People hurt you, so you have a guard up. It was the sad truth that had dictated my relationships for so long. I would let people "in" but not all the way.
We are created to love. Not only are we created to love God, but we are created to love one another. True love begins in letting people close, so close that you are vulnerable. This means there will be pain, but love is worth it. As I began to proclaim these truths over myself I felt such freedom. People will hurt me and I will hurt them. After all we are all loving out of a fallen nature. It is so much better to love and be loved, than to be alone and "safe."
If you have been hurt and are facing the same trust issues I had face them head on. Open yourself up to God and to others. We are made for relationship. Don't stay trapped. Be free.

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